When Character Counts!

I want to share with you an amazing example of one child’s courage and character at the end of the Orange Olympics, an annual athletic event which took place at High Plains on June 12, 2013.  But, first a little background. 

 

In education, as with many other fields, we tend to rely on catch phrases which are intended to resonate with the audience and make a complex concept more meaningful and memorable.  Sometimes, however, our jargon does the opposite because the phrase is wide open to a variety of interpretations.   ‘Whole child education’ is one of those terms.  What does it mean?  On the surface, it even seems a little silly – after all, who would teach half of a child?

Whole child education, however, refers to the idea that all children learn best when their academic, emotional, physical, and social understandings are addressed.  Yes, we write report cards and update you on the CMTs and other standardized tests as evidence of our students’ academic achievements.   In fact, for a while now, it has seemed as if educational thinking, practice, and policy have been singularly focused on academic achievement.   In Orange, that is not the case.  We all know that to be successful participating world citizens, our students must also be healthy, confident, self-motivated, considerate, and honest.  In other words, they need to be young people of character.   These attributes are, of course, treasured by our families; and we realize what we do in our schools supplements these same values you are teaching at home.  But, be assured, all of our schools do focus on these qualities through programs, such as ‘Character Counts,’ through planned philanthropic activities, and by capitalizing on ‘teachable moments’ when they occur.  Yesterday’s event at the Olympics illustrated the importance of ‘whole child’ character education perfectly; and hopefully, all of our students paid attention and learned something of value.

At the closing ceremonies of the Olympics, a young man was called up to podium to receive his gold medal for winning his event.  He took the stage, and in front of his peers and a crowd of parents found the courage to express, ‘I didn’t win this; it doesn’t belong to me; the person who actually won this event has the same first name as I do, but he’s the person who won.’   Imagine the nervousness he felt in front of a crowd; imagine the choices running through his head.   He could accept the medal and keep it.  He could accept the medal, for now, and then after the ceremony, give it back and explain it wasn’t his.  But, he took the least easy path available to him and chose ‘doing the right thing’ at the moment when doing the right thing was called for.  In front of everyone, he ensured that the medal and recognition went to the person to whom it belonged.

That’s character!

The Death of Boredom vs. Bored to Death

I worry about my grandchildren, specifically, and our youngest generation of students, generally, and their overall inability to accept boredom into their lives.  Without boredom, how will they think? 

When I was a child, my mother and father expected me to rake, shovel, dust, and do a whole host of very boring things.  Yet, while I did these chores, my mind was active.  As a duster, I remember ‘staging’ commercials in my mind.  I could dramatically wave my hands and ad lib about my streak-free shine and Pledge’s ability to bring out the natural beauty of the wood.  As I got older, I used the boring times, such as walking home from field hockey practice or washing dishes at Friendlies, to problem-solve the ‘major’ issues in my young life.  I ran scenarios; I pre-scripted upcoming events (as in, I’ll say this, and then he’ll say that, and then I’ll say…); I made plans, both for the weekend … and for the future.  Even now, when I’m driving home to Massachusetts or gardening in the backyard, my mind is active.  Boredom is important to my mental processes.  Boredom is where I reminisce about the past and sift through new opportunities, ideas, and solutions.  Boredom leads to a clear mind.  A clear mind leads to creativity.

The problem I see in my beloved and beautiful grandchildren is their desire to fill every moment with activity and their complete uneasiness with ‘boredom.’  If we are waiting for a table in a restaurant, riding the escalator in the mall, or even standing in the kitchen, waiting for the toast to pop up, they are texting or playing a quick game of ‘Draw Something.’   In the back seat of the car, they have headsets on, cutting them off from both conversation and observation. 

They call it multi-tasking, but they watch TV and are on their computers or cell phones at the same time making even TV-watching less cerebral (if that’s possible!), because they aren’t processing either the facial expressions or the dialogue.  If you ask them a thought question about the show, they respond, ‘I don’t know. Why?’ as if thinking about the story-line was absurd. 

I love them dearly, but I worry that I never, ever hear them complain ‘I’m bored;’ and as a result, I never, ever get to say, ‘Well, think of something to do.’

For more information about kids, creativity, and boredom, check out:

Aha! Parenting's "Why Boredom is Good for Your Child"

Essential Kids'  "The Battle to Let Them Be Bored"

 

 

 

 

Schools and the Social Networking Terrain

I don't think social media is getting any easier to navigate.  There's a lot of information circling amongst my peers purporting the merits of 'going social' by creating a district Facebook page or by joining the ranks of the 'twittering Superintendents' ... or by doing both, since each has its separate merits. 

 

Racing through my head lately is that piece of professional advice, coupled with a nagging fear that Orange isn't doing enough to make our kids as cybersmart as they should be before hitting middle school, ... and tripled by this information I just read this week:  Author Emily Bazelon wrote an article in The Atlantic detailing how an anonymous student created a Facebook page called "let's Start Drama" at a Middletown, Connecticut, middle school and used the page to bully her fellow students.  She called herself simply 'Drama Queen.'   Bazelon writes, “She hovered over them in cyberspace like a bad fairy, with the power to needle kids into ending friendships and starting feuds and fistfights… Wrapped in her cloak of anonymity, she was free to pass along cruel gossip without personal consequences.  She started by posting a few idle rumors, and when that gained her followers, she asked them to send her private messages relaying more gossip, promising not to disclose the source. Which girl had just lost her virginity? What boy had asked a girl to sext him a nude photo?” Before long, Drama Queen had an audience of 500, many of whom had follow-up comments on the rumors. She pitted students against each other by posting side-by-side photos of girls and asking who was hotter and photos of boys asking, “Who would win a fight?”  It turns out that after investigating, the middle school turned up 12 other pages of the same ilk.

 

Any parent and educator would find this scenario scary.  She had 500 like-minded participants -- or, at least voyeurs into this dehumanizing world she had created?  

 

In my mind, we should be teaching our children to be exactly the same person on-line as they are in person... they should be the same person they are when they walk the corridors of the school... and the streets of any new city they visit.  If they wouldn't go up to other classmates, in person, and call them names or say cruel things, then they shouldn't do it online either.  If they wouldn't walk up to a stranger in the mall and hand that stranger a picture of themselves in their underwear, then they shouldn't 'sext' that picture, or post it online, either.  There's something about the 'artificiality' of social media that has stripped us of the basic sensibilities we know to be true in our daily interactions with 'real' people.  It's as if in the social media arena we aren't 'responsible' for what we say in the same way we are responsible for ourselves in public. 

 

In the Bazelton article, she talks about two 'organizations' who are tackling the cruelty of cyberbullying; one is BullySpace and the other is Anonymous (yes! that same controversial vigilante group).  Both are using artificial intelligence and algorithms to detect bullying language and posts and then targeting those message posters with pop-ups which read anything from, "That was nasty! Wait 60-seconds before you post!" to expletive-driven, 'What gives you the right!' messages.  Facebook, who reports that kids would rather be expelled from school than expelled from Facebook, has started shutting down offensive pages.  But, in truth, they are coming late to the party!

 

If you haven't already, it's not too late to talk to your pre-teen about social media and what your expectations are for his or behavior in that arena as well as in public.  We can't assume that they are naturally transferring those values, and the consequences for mistakes can be devastating.  Often, when cyberbullies are caught, or when a community finds out about a bullying page and lashes out at the kids who started it, the kids are shocked.  They say they 'were only trying to have some fun!'  They claim they 'didn't know anyone would be hurt by it!'  They rationalize 'it's not like it was real or anything!'

 

It's not easy to navigate, and it's real!